I just finished my first week back at work. I actually chose to return to work a week earlier than planned because I anticipated that by this time I would be unbelievably bored and recovered enough to handle working half-days. I experienced a bit more pain this week than usual, but I’m not as exhausted as I thought I would be. On Monday I will return to working full-time.

This week I’ve been thinking and reflecting on Kahlil Gibran’s excerpt from The Prophet, entitled “On Work“–particularly this passage:

You work that you may keep pace with the earth and the soul of the earth.
For to be idle is to become a stranger unto the seasons, and to step out of life’s procession, that marches in majesty and proud submission towards the infinite.

When you work you are a flute through whose heart the whispering of the hours turns to music.
Which of you would be a reed, dumb and silent, when all else sings together in unison?

Always you have been told that work is a curse and labour a misfortune.
But I say to you that when you work you fulfil a part of earth’s furthest dream, assigned to you when that dream was born,
And in keeping yourself with labour you are in truth loving life,
And to love life through labour is to be intimate with life’s inmost secret.

Returning to work makes me feel like I’m reconnecting with something larger than myself. While waiting to recover from my surgery, I was forced out of “life’s procession” for a bit, but the excitement and anticipation of returning to the projects, tasks, and people that I left behind further encouraged me to get well as soon as possible. Work certainly has its stresses and challenges, but the happiness and joy I receive in return far outweighs any negative aspects.

While I’m recovered enough to return to work, I’m not yet ready for yoga. Earlier this week I optimistically thought that I could go back today, but I woke up this morning in too much pain. Also, I don’t think that I can handle all the siting up and lying down that’s required in Bikram. Maybe next Saturday will be my first day back?

In any case, I believe that once I get back into the yoga room, the real healing will begin to happen. I will discover what this new heart valve can really do and I will re-learn to trust my body for the first time since I learned I would need the surgery. Months before the surgery, this tiny voice in the back of my head to constantly asked “are we ok? are we going to pass out? are we pushing it too hard? is my heart beating too fast? did my heart just palpitate?” I’m looking forward to putting this little voice to rest.